Seminars teach kids about 'Stranger Danger' Children get tips on self-defense and how to spot a possible kidnapper BY KATHY CHANG Staff Writer Trust your gut instinct. That's what Ron Shuali, managing director and master instructor of Fun Fitness LLC in Highland Park, says to the children he addresses during "Stranger Danger" sessions. "If a child ever gets that weird, icky feeling around a person, it's important that they go with whatever feels right," he said. "They should never second-guess themselves." Shuali, who started teaching "Stranger Danger" sessions two years ago, teaches children 3 to 12 years old that a stranger could be either a male or a female. "Everyone is a stranger," said Shuali. "I ask the kids if I'm a stranger, and some are not sure. They have to understand that I am a stranger, but their parents gave them permission to be there with me, so it's OK." Shuali added that child molesters often seem like the nicest and sweetest persons. "They usually look normal," he said. Shuali, who was in Metuchen recently giving his seminar, has been giving free 45- minute "Stranger Danger" seminars around Middlesex County. "Twenty-four percent of children nationwide are kidnapped by a 'stranger,' " he said. "The 'never talk to strangers' rule does not protect children in the situations they are most likely to face," he said. "On top of this, it can be confusing. Adults do not model the behavior because they often talk to strangers. There is too much misinformation and not enough good, effective information." Shuali said his mission with the "Stranger Danger" seminars is to provide children with every tool they may need if they encounter a potential kidnapping situation. "It's important that a child does not get in that car and does not go to that second location," said Shuali. "I make sure that the children know that I am serious, and I tell them that they might never see their mommy or daddy again. This might seem harsh, but as long as they can get away and escape … that's what matters." Shuali also mentioned that the "Stranger Danger" seminar is important in suburban areas like Metuchen, and not just in urban areas. The borough recently had a case where a man attempted to kidnap an 11-year-old girl as she got off the school bus on April 10. The girl told police that the man, who was described as a white-haired, white man in a silver, four-door vehicle, said to "Drop your book bag and get in the car." The girl did not get into the vehicle, and when she saw another juvenile, who was her neighbor, she ran toward him and into his house. The parents of the juvenile then called police, police said. Shuali gives tips to both children and parents. "I teach children how to identify a stranger and how to run away from a stranger," he said. "It's a good idea for a child to run in a 'z' shape when running away, because it's easier for a stranger to grab the child if they are running in a straight line." Shuali said the child should also yell "Stranger, help, stranger, help!" as they are running away. "The last thing a stranger wants is a child who knows what he or she is doing and is knowledgeable," said Shuali. "Also, they want to draw as little attention to themselves as possible." If a child is in a group, Shuali said, the children should lock their arms together. "Even I, as a 270-pound man, would have a hard time pulling three or four kids that are locked together, because their energies are pulling in different directions," he said. If a child is alone, Shuali said, the child should lock his or her arms around anything, including a bench, a tree or a pole. During the class, Shuali asks the children what kind of lies a stranger could use to get the child to come with him. "I have gotten some crazy answers with this new generation," he said. "The video games like Xbox and PlayStation are the new candy and lost puppies." Shuali said he makes sure the information sinks in. "I may spend 10 minutes on one subject if I don't think everyone understands what to do," he said. "I have the kids run through different scenarios. If a child is running away and runs to a dead end, I have them pick up anything they may find and hit the stranger in the head and the stomach. This way, we have the stranger reach up to their head and then their stomach." Shuali added that if a stranger has a gun or any type of weapon, the child should follow the same rules that he teaches. "That stranger wants to kidnap you and is not likely to fire the gun," he said. Shuali teaches the children and parents to create a "safe word" that only they know. "This is for when someone different picks your child up from school," he said. "The adult picking your child up should know the safe word, and if not, the child should go get an adult." Shuali said other tips include having children tell their parents where they are going and when they are coming home. A child should not go to places alone, should play only at places their parents say are OK, and should not take any shortcuts or alleys. A child should never tell anyone they are home alone, and a child should always walk against traffic on the sidewalk. Shuali also provides parent tips, which include maintaining current identification - including photograph, video and fingerprints - and current addresses and phone numbers of their children's friends, keeping all doors and windows locked, and not advertising their child's name on clothing, school supplies or backpacks. "Parents are surprised [about] the names of their children on their backpacks, jackets, and even name plates, because they don't think of it as being bad," said Shuali. "But this is a way that a stranger can win a child over. These strangers keep on picking at a child until they see that glimmer in their eye." Shuali's next free "Stranger Danger" seminar will be held in Old Bridge on Oct. 6. For more information, visit www.funfitnesstraining.com or call (732) 777-1326.